Charlie Sheen's first draft of letter to Chuck Lorre - Satire - Salon.com: Stop trying to use your mind control on me! You disguise it with fancy words like "rehab" and "psychotic," and not only have I been aware of your plans for 177 episodes now (1+7+2 and a half men = 9 and another 2 and half men rounds out to be about 11, 9/11 truth forever, you HEAR ME OBAMA?!), but I have gracefully ignored both you and the chip you implanted in my molars that tells the government what I'm thinking.
And that's just the beginning. Read on...